Halting a 12-Year-Old Loop

I had another breakthrough session with my spiritual practitioner, Joan Coletto, who I met through the Bodhi Spiritual Center in Chicago.

We have been working on a behavior modification protocol around my self-care with a focus on weight loss. In this session, I told Joan that my weight loss has been stagnate. I am not eating the wrong things. I’m simply not eating enough for my body to shift out of storage mode into utilization.

Hannah-Bronfman-hands up

Joan repeatedly emphasized what my nutritionist told me. You have to eat to lose weight. The key is eating the right things at the right times. So our session was focused on exploring why I am denying myself the pleasure of nutritious food and thus the joy of weight loss.

As I focused internally to determine what my subconscious was telling me, I remembered myself as 12-year-old locked in my apartment while my mom visited her friends. They didn’t have kids so I was often left at home while they gathered to drink, smoke and play cards. My mom thought it would be safer to leave me at home alone.

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My mom often would not return until the sun started to go down at 6 or 7pm. This is how I told time because we did not have a clock. I think this has something to do with the watches I have collected over the years and a slightly skewed perception of time.

Most times, I would not eat until mom returned home. I would sit and look out the window or watch TV while focusing on my hunger pains in order to ignore the loneliness. This is at the root of several recurring behaviors:

  • Staying in the house for days at a time
  • Ignoring my hunger pains
  • Not making the effort to cook meals for myself, if I’m the only one at home
  • Forgoing sleep, even if I’m extremely tired while waiting for my husband to return home from work

Action Items

Joan recommended the following activities:

  • Use MyFitnessPal to record my meals
  • Send a record of my meals to Joan
  • Schedule three meals and two protein snacks in my daily calendar
  • Go for a walk everyday, no excuses!


With all the soulwork and therapy I have done, I’m still amazed at how our past experiences can play on a continuous loop throughout out lives if we never become aware of the patterns.

Thanks for taking the time to read about my journey. I would like to hear about yours.




Image Credits

This post was inspired by the WordPress Daily Prompt:  Loop


  1. Sherry,
    I think of you often and am so impressed that you keep forging forward and continue to seek out new ideas.
    One of my friends, who is a cancer survivor and has a tough time keeping the weight off has a mantra, “a walk a day keeps the cancer away”. She still has a tough time taking a walk daily even though she’s smart, like you and knows she should. We don’t do it everyday but whenever I call her, I always say, ‘let’s walk and talk’. Ever since my first prodding to get her to walk and talk with me as I walked has evolved into her walking during many of her conversations now. I forgot to mention she lives in TN and I was in TX and now IN, but we still call each other up and encourage the other to get out and walk while we talk. Reach out to your friends as you walk and talk.

    Another idea, stand up while you talk. Just standing is better than sitting, I used to do that as my desk all the time.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Hi Pat. Thanks for leaving such a thoughtful message. I like the idea of walking and talking. There are always people I need to connect with that is often put off. That is a great way for me to take care of two things at once.


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